A Fanilow Fan Frenzy

I don't think I could add anything to this. Except to say this did not shock me in the least. Some things in the fan world never, ever change.

Those Fanilows sure are feisty!

Barry Manilow’s loyal fans were out in full force on a recent night at the restaurant TAO, where the legendary 69-year-old singer dined after performing nearby in “Manilow on Broadway.”

“Several groups of women were beside themselves trying to get to the table for photos and autographs,” a witness at the midtown hotspot told us. “TAO management had to keep fans at bay to allow the group a quiet meal.”

That said, a 15-year-old girl sitting near Brooklyn-born Manilow and his group managed to “slip by” management and ask Manilow for a photo, which he “gladly” posed for, the source said.

Just how many photos do you need?

Not surprised,
Texas Fan

A fitting tribute

Garry Kief posted this on the alt-fan site:

"Fran's photographs were a reflection of the love and goodness that was in her heart. All of us at STILETTO would look forward to what she had to share with us and with friends around the world. Though she might be gone in body, her heart and soul live on in the photographs that brought us all such joy. Thank you to everyone who has honored her memory by your contribution to the Manilow Music Project. Someday, some kid, somewhere, will bring music to the world because of you...and because of Fran."

As I said earlier today; Fran had CLASS. That's something that is a rare commodity in the Manilow fan world these days. It's nice to know that we (her friends) aren't the only ones that recognized it. We should all take a page from her book.

Today there were posts on Barry's Facebook page about "saving the bamms for us when we come next week." Fran would have scoffed at that behavior. As I said, she was one classy lady.

The fan world will miss her and I will miss her wit, her wisdom and her candor.

Rest in peace Fran and know that you left a part of yourself with each of us.
Texas Fan

For those of you who wish to honor Fran by making a donation to the Manilow Music Project here is the direct link:

https://secure.commonground.convio.com/ManilowMusicProject/donations/

So close and yet so far

Like many of you, this past weekend was spent remembering Fran Galiardo. This morning the words to that song came to mind, "so close and yet so far". That described my relationship with Fran. We were close through social media, yet we lived so very far apart and never got the chance to meet.

The first time I saw Fran was at a Philadelphia concert years ago. Although I didn't know it at the time, I was sitting just a few seats to her right. When Barry picked someone to dance with, he chose Fran. Not knowing her, I snapped this picture. It wasn't until just recently that we realized we were both there and the picture of the dance girl was her. You can imagine her excitement since she didn't know there were any photographs out there taken by others. I happily emailed her a copy.

Then she shared some of her own pictures of that moment with me. I like to think of her that way--happy and smiling.

That's the thing with the Manilow world--many of us are close (we know about each other's families, their struggles, and we pray for them), but yet so far. We never get the chance to meet in person, but it doesn't mean we don't consider them friends. Friendships were formed because of Barry but they grew because we opened our lives and shared them with others.

I hope we all take a moment and tell those friends how much they mean to us. I wish I had told Fran, because now I can only tell others. She made me smile every single time I talked to her. We shared a baseball rivalry, we both adored our children, and of course, we loved Barry's music. 

I hope one day to meet those who are "so close and yet so far"...but until then I want you to know that YOU have changed my life in more ways than I can even enumerate.

Love across the miles,
Texas Fan

Why I'm a Manilow Fan

I wrote this post back in July of 2011. Sadly I never got to meet Fran in person. She passed away this past week. But although we only communicated through social media and email we shared many laughs, baseball stories, Manilow stories and I was with her during her son's college process. She was a proud mother, a loving wife and an amazing friend. I pray that God will give her family comfort during this time and that we all never miss another opportunity to tell our loved ones how much they mean to us. 

I've been involved in the Manilow fan world in depth since 2006. My first encounter with fandom came at my first show in Las Vegas on my birthday 5 years ago. It was a positive experience. So much so, that I'm still close with that fan today (even though she's my daughter's age). Since that first encounter, I've had many other ones. Some good, some not so good, and some absolutely horrible. I've made some good friends, made some enemies, had enemies turn into friends, and choose to ignore the rest. I've been disillusioned and discouraged by fan behavior in the past and vented here on my blog numerous times.

Every now and then, after being away from the fan world, it happens. My faith in the "nice" factor is restored and I realize that not all fans are jealous, petty and vindictive. Tonight was one of those nights. Two fans (whom I've never met in person, by the way) took time out of their festivities tonight in Vegas to meet my daughter who was there for the weekend. She has heard me talk so much about the fan world, and one of these ladies actually took time out of her busy life to mail my daughter's wedding cake top to her two years ago (again, without us ever having met).

Barry has said often that his fans are unique. I've said that the friendships I've made over the last five years are priceless. But tonight, I also learned that there really is something special and unique about Manilow fans. When you meet these type of fans, it makes you proud to say that Barry actually brought us together.

Thanks Fran and Susan for welcoming Jillian into your world tonight. I hope some day to meet you in person, but for now, I treasure your friendship.

Tipping my hat to Barry (for bringing us all together),

Texas Fan

And then there was Harmony!

Since I've been trying to be a good girl and walk every day, I've found that listening to musicals makes the time go by and distracts me from the boring task. A few days ago I listened to a recording that was made for the cast (the one at the LaJolla) and there are so many songs we haven't heard yet. Every single song seems to lead to the next and so clearly tells the story without a single word of dialogue.

I've always believed that the songs we have heard so often--Every Single Day and Stars in the Night were masterpieces of music meshing so well with the lyrics. But listening to the entire musical score just makes me want to see it on the stage even more.

There is this one song in particular that I absolutely love--it's fun and very poignant. The doctor in the group is telling his parents that he's not happy and wants to spend his life singing. His parents, of course, were not overjoyed about his decision. They came up with every excuse in the book for him NOT to do it. But at the end of the song, he asks them, "Don't you want me to be happy?" His parents couldn't fight that question. And at the end of the song, you felt both the parents and the singer's angst over the decision. He wanted to do it, but he knew it would disappoint them. They wanted him to be happy but they were afraid it would be throwing away his education and his future earning potential.

It's songs like these that make me want to shout from the rooftops that this play MUST be seen. The emotions in the lyrics and music and the story of men who found their passion and determined to pursue it, no matter the cost, make it timely and inspirational.

It's my prayer (and has been for many years) that we will see Harmony very soon. And when we do, it's going to be a huge hit, on the level of Les Miserables or Phantom of the Opera. Until then we wait (not patiently but with anticipation!)

And then there was Harmony!
Texas Fan

How much would you pay for a handshake?

With Barry in New York and ticket prices at an all-time high, I've been pondering this question.

I know how much I paid ($250 more than once) and at that time it seemed sane and logical. I rationalized spending that kind of money as "my due" after raising my children and taking care of my father and great aunt for so many years. When I think back on that time I wonder if the expense was truly worth the cost. If you can put a price on a handshake or a glance from a celebrity who is merely an entertainer/actor, that's a high price to pay for a few seconds of contact. But then again, some would argue that those few seconds give them great joy.

Does the joy last? On the contrary, many fans experience what they call PMD (post Manilow depression) after attending the show. The thrill is over, the music has ended, and you go home. But that's not where it ends. It's an addiction for some; they go back time and time again to get their fix. 

Don't get me wrong. The money I spent during those few years of Vegas shows provided me with some amazing entertainment and some long lasting friendships. You can't devalue that aspect of the expense. Granted I wasn't there every single night and when I was there, I didn't see every show from the front row or the stage. I got a few handshakes and one encounter putting on Barry's jacket. I got to witness and photograph dances with close friends and watch the joy they had while doing it. Was it exciting at the time? Sure. I'd be lying if I said it wasn't. But the thrill never lasted and it certainly didn't provide me with permanent joy or happiness.

So really...how much is a handshake worth? Or a glance or a smile? Or a dance? Or a photograph?

Is it worth compromising time with your family or sacrificing the relationship within a marriage? Is it worth spending your retirement and closing out your 401k to pay for the shows and the trips? Is it worth accumulating mounds of credit card debt? Is it worth losing all sense of reality and living in a fantasy world?

Would I pay $250 (or even $700) for another front row seat? Absolutely not. It's the same show, the same songs, and the same jokes. I can experience that from the $20 seats. It's also worth mentioning that the longer he stayed in Vegas and performed across the country, the contact he once had with the audience has diminished. The stages got higher and the on-stage seating disappeared. The dances and other interaction stopped. There is no longer an opportunity to sing on stage with him, dance or interact one-on-one. Many have speculated about the cause of these changes: did the frenzied fan behavior cause him to draw back? Only he knows. A once accessible entertainer has become a celebrity on stage.

Some might say I'm jealous of those who continue to go. Not at all. I am blessed beyond belief and I value those real relationships with my family and friends. Call me a cynic, but I've heard so many stories and witnessed personally the destruction of lives because of an obsession with a man who sings on a stage and knows how to entertain and move his audience with his music.  That music does create a common bond with other fans that often blossoms into friendships. But for me, that's where it ends. 

Sadly, that's not where it ends for those who have paid a very steep price for their fandom. 

Finding joy with family and friends,

Texas Fan

I'm Back!

It's been over a year since I last posted on this blog. Much has happened in my life to push out the Manilow world altogether, but that doesn't mean I don't reminisce often about the good times and great friends I made during those years.

One of those friends told me the other day that she missed my blog (this one's for you!) and I have to say that I miss writing it. Even though I'm not involved in any of the craziness in the fan world any more, I follow the news about Barry and I enjoy reading about his success. That doesn't mean I'm ready to jump in with both feet, but there are things I would like to comment on periodically and this is the best place to do it. My blog. My opinion. My thoughts.

I've been listening to some of my Manilow favs as I attempt to exercise every day and those songs bring floods of memories back, some good and some not so good. But as we all know, with time, the bad ones fade and the good ones tend to take over. I'm happy to say that I can look back on that time in my life now and smile. I made some incredible friends, had some wonderful times, and always loved the music.

Will I be going to New York or any other venue to see him? No. I've closed that chapter. I have a grandson to focus my travel time on and a family that has become more important to me than they ever were before. So I'll be traveling back and forth to my daughter's home and spending my vacation time and my money on my sweet little guy. My priorities have definitely changed.

Will I ever see my old friends and meet some new ones that I've only known online? I certainly hope so. I found out in 2012 who my friends were and I was surprised at the ones who hung in there and rose to the surface when I needed them the most. The friends embody the good Manilow memories.

Will I go to the opening of Harmony if it makes it to the stage? That's a resounding YES! The songs from that musical are some of the most inspiring music and lyrics I have ever heard. I will move heaven and earth to get there if the rumors are true.

Until the next time (and/or the music moves me),
Texas Fan

It's ALL about the music

2012 has arrived and so has the end of my Manilow Musings. I was listening to a Streisand song on the drive back to Dallas last week and she was talking about the song we all sing on New Years's Eve, Auld Lang Syne and what it means: for the sake of old times. So, for the sake of old times, I'm going back to the beginning--the first time I ever heard Barry sing live and what the music meant to me.

I had just finished chemotherapy and treated myself to the concert in San Antonio in the middle of the summer outside. I was about 12 rows back and had no knowledge or information about the Manilow fan world. I was suspended in time by the Mayflower music and the few songs he did from Harmony that I had never even heard before. Thus began my real love affair with the magic of Manilow's music.

It will be nice to return to that magic. To coin a line from "Julie and Julia" and apply it here--I'm in love with the Manilow in my head; and the Manilow in my head truly is ALL about the music. When I listen to Here at the Mayflower, Paradise Cafe, Harmony and most recently 15 Minutes I I am reminded of why I began this journey and why, even though I will no longer be involved in the fan world, I will always and forever be in love with the music of Manilow.

After all, it truly is "music too magic to end"!

Over and out,

Texas Fan

A Manilow Musings Q&A

Since, over the last few days, I've been asked questions (either directly or indirectly) about my blog and its contents, I thought it might be fitting to end 2011 with a little Q&A and put all of this to rest once and for all. The answers might not satisfy but they will be honest and truthful and perhaps explain why for the past 5 years I have spoken up even when I have been personally attacked.

When did all of "this" begin?

By "this" I don't mean the blog or loving Barry's music. It all began for me on the Barrynet when a group of fans began to monopolize the posts by talking over and over again about how "hot" Barry was, adding sexual innuendos and literally begging him to wear leather.

Why did this behavior bother me so much?

It bothered me because I felt the Barrynet was a public board that anyone could read and it was casting a negative light on Barry and his fans. It also bothered me because at the time we were trying to raise awareness for our fan club charity and for a scrapbook that we were making for a friend who had passed away and they monopolized the message board.

What happened when I spoke up against it?

I was attacked personally, in emails, and publicly on the message board. It was clear that if anyone spoke out against them, you would be attacked. I just couldn't tolerate that type of bullying and I began to speak out against it on the Barrynet and on my blog. And thus began the war between me and these group of fans.

What makes you so knowledgeable about the fan world (this one comes from Kay's comment)?

I think this was possibly derogatory but I'll answer it anyway. I never claimed to be the expert on the fan world, just the fan world I've witnessed. I've attended enough shows and been to Vegas often enough to witness this type of negative fan behavior over and over again: stalking, harassment, bullying, and spoken to enough Manilow employees and hotel staff to know what goes on before, during and after a show.

You don't call the things you say in your blog about fans bullying and hateful (another question courtesy of Kay)?

No. I don't. They are simply reports of this type of behavior and my opinion about how wrong it is. If you speak out against bullying does that make you a bully? The obvious answer is no. I guess you could see these posts as hateful, but I see them as exposes bringing the truth out into the open.

Do you have a problem with fans gathering at the front of the stage to visit (another question from Kay)?

No problem at all. But, when it's obvious they are "marking their territory" and glare at anyone who dares to encroach on it, I do.

Why can't I just be friends with these women?

Let's see. I have tried. Actually one of the group approached me two years ago and attempted to make peace. I agreed and made every attempt to call a truce. But, that was short lived when I posted something they disagreed with and assumed it was related to them. That's the problem with these fans--you can't cross them or disagree with anything they say or do. If you do, you incur their wrath.

Why can't you just live and let live?

Why can't they? I had every intention of "living and let living" when I came to the shows in Vegas but it was clear they did not. Besides I'm not the type of person that bows down to bullies and someone had to speak out against them. They will claim I do not know them so I can't say anything about them. But I do know how they treated me and have treated other fans. I have had my fill of it all and as Barry often says, "sometimes all it takes is one voice" to create change.

Why, after all this time, am I ending the posts?

It's time. After the last show in Vegas I realized that I no longer want to waste my time on these fans. They will never change because they have convinced themselves and others that their behavior is perfectly normal. (And pigs fly too!). I no longer care to have any connection with the Manilow fan world (other than the few close friends I have made). It's time to shut this door in my life and move on.

So...Happy New Year to my loyal readers and to those who visit here just to see what I'm saying about them (and their friends). I can't say it's been fun, but I can say it's been REAL and I have gained a good education about fandom and how it works. The psychology of it all is fascinating!

Goodbye 2011...Hello 2012 (free from Manilow fan drama)!

Texas Fan

What happens in Vegas...

...isn't going to stay in Vegas this time. Of course, what would you expect from Vegas and spending the weekend around Barry's fans? I have to say it's never surprising the amount of drama that seems to follow the fan world and you can always expect to witness human theater in its rarest form.

What is going to follow won't be pretty. It will make many fans unhappy and cause others to cheer. But it has to be said. So many fans hide in the shadows of the fans who act like they control the Manilow world, for fear of retribution. I never have been afraid of them and as I close out my Manilow posts, I will continue to tell it like it is. Bullies, as we discovered this weekend, do not like to be confronted.

It has always amazed me how these women act like the hotel where Barry is performing is "their domain". They don't like outsiders on their turf and they let it be known over and over again. They do it with vicious glares, hateful looks, constant staring and even physical violence. They scream obscenities across the casino and they puff up their chests like they are the "head chiefs in charge". It's a spectacle to watch and disturbing to experience first hand.

I specifically didn't post very much about my upcoming trip to avoid that very type of "welcome" but it was unavoidable. The group of them were headed toward the theater, undoubtedly to lurk outside the doors because they had heard Barry was rehearsing that day with the "undiscovered" talent who was going to be introduced at the show that night. The minute they saw me, the whispers, stares and I'm sure the gossip chain began. My daughter found it all rather amusing, as so many of our family members do. They can't understand why grown women act like teenagers. Quite frankly neither can I. But I walked past them not saying a word and determined to enjoy my weekend.

The next encounter came in the lobby of the theater the night of the last show. A group of fans started pointing at me, giving me snide looks, and saying things like, "how dare she show her face here; she's got some nerve; are you sure that's her?" I just smiled and shook my head and stood there waiting for my daughter.

Before the show, my daughter went down to the front to say hello to a friend of ours who was sitting up front on the side, and meet someone else sitting behind her. The entire time she was down there their prying eyes were burning a hole in her back. I was watching the entire thing from the upper rows of seats. She didn't say anything to them, however, and returned to her seat. (And before the blonde squad says, "see...she went up to the front to visit"...it's not the same thing. She wasn't marking her territory; she was just saying hi to a friend.)

After the show, we made our way down front so we could take some pictures with our friends and have them snap a photo of us in front of the curtain. I was talking to my friend and my daughter caught one of them glaring at us from the corner of her eye. She turned around, looked her in the eye, and said, "What?" No response. She then said, "What do you want?" Again, no response. She then said her name and said, "What do you want?" Still no response. The only response we got is utter embarrassment for being called out and fear because she NEVER backs up her actions herself. At that point, I told my daughter to drop it and just let it go.

Why did I think it was important to tell this story? Because so many women in the past have come to me with similar stories of harassment. Stares, glares, hateful comments, and even physical shoves. They are too afraid (or what did they say, "classy") to speak up but they have no problem acting as a mob and making people feel threatened and intimidated. Speak out against any one of them and you incur their threats and their wrath. Disagree with them and you get the same. Speak up against fan club mistreatment and they pounce on you with all their fury.

They ALL justify their behavior as "sticking up for their friends" and "their love for Barry". But it is so much more than that. It's a gang mentality that shifts and shuffles them around, making other fans think they are "in charge". The grim reality is they are just fans and they will never get what they truly want.

When people won't listen to reason the only reasonable thing to do is walk away and leave them to the consequences of their own actions.

Walking away and NOT looking back,

Texas Fan